FUNNIES !

Here's a collection of short funny quotes.

I'm an excellent housekeeper.
Every time I get a divorce, I keep the house. - Zsa Zsa Gabor

I'm not offended by all the dumb-blonde jokes because
I know that I'm not dumb. I also know I'm not blonde. - Dolly Parton

Thank God I'm an atheist. - Anonymous

Avoid hangovers: stay drunk. - Anonymous

Men don't care what's on TV. They only care what else is on TV. - Jerry Seinfeld

I'm trying to read a book on how to relax, but I keep falling asleep. - Jim Loy

Laughing stock: cattle with a sense of humor. - Anonymous

I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally. - W. C. Fields